Marrying a Snail
I'm not sure I'm done on the topic, being among one of the first to get married (tell it, Grandma, you would have never thought!!)... well, I was thinking about being married, and what it means, and what is so different than living together. I guess this is what I came up with: it's like being a snail. I know it doesn't sound appealing, but let me elaborate!!
We chose to live our lives with lacks instead of presences. There's no place in the world where I could live and have all my friends around me. Our friendships are more defined by their absence than by their presence, and that is a tough way to live! It's not like living always in the same place, getting married to your grade school desk neighbour, and sending your kids to the same school you went to. We- and with this I mean most of you reading this post!- have chosen to travel, to live abroad, or we have friends who live abroad, and it's all defined by their absence. It's not easy, expecially since we were brought up believing friendship needs nurturing, that true friends are the ones you talk to everyday. Well, that's BS. My best friends live as far as they can from me, but that doesn't make them lesser friends than the ones I see everyday- and I know for a fact that's true for all of you! Anyway, I think that being married eases a little of that pain. I mean, it's not the place you call home, it's the people, right? So, being married it's almost as if I'm always bringing my home with me, for my home is Cielo, not a specific place. That's the snail theory. What do you think???
Baci
pontificato by Bridging Jones @ 1:05 AM
2 friends scribbled on the bridge
2 Comments:
Questo post mette a nudo una cosa di cui abbiamo parlato di recente e ovviamente, come di tutte le tue teorie, di cui mi sono impossessata, che ho fatto mia, che condivido in tutto e per tutto. Non importa se in un altro continente, in un altro stato, o semplicemente in un'altra città, la verità è che l'assenza definisce molti dei nostri rapporti. Però è anche vero che li alimenta e che non riesce a spegnerli e che anzi, la sete di vedersi, di stare assieme, di condividere non accenna a spegnersi. Così rende anche più bello il ritrovarsi, il cercarsi, il dover aspettare la notte o la mattina svegliarsi presto per parlarsi, per raccontarsi la propria giornata. Ci aiuta a non darci per scontate(i). E non mi pare affatto poco.
Rowena
I'm quite sure that true-real-big friendship doesn't need nurturing, I feel a lot closer to people I don't see for months than to the ones I meet every single day, since I know FRIENDS are there if I need them and in a five minutes talk we can catch up on each other.
Sure sometimes it's painful not to have your friends around when you want to celebrate or simply enjoy moments of your life.
L'Ale
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